Tag Archives: health insurance

Uncategorized

I Need a Job.

3 Comments

Welcome to the world of unemployment. It’s not that bad of a world, minus the whole losing money every second of the day sort of thing.

The good news is that while I’m officially unemployed (sans unemployment insurance, since I resigned), I’ve picked up a few random freelance gigs here and there. My uncle always needs random work done for his e-marketing firm, and he seems really happy with the work I’ve done for him thus far, which makes me feel really good. Yea, he’s my uncle, but he’s also a really talented marketing entrepreneur and I know he wouldn’t be hiring me for more jobs if he felt like I didn’t have the chops.

I have a steady income (1/3rd my rent) each month from ongoing writing assignments from him, with occasional extra work for the firm. This month, in addition to my normal copywriting, I did my first official web page design assignment for him. I guess he liked how the design looked but wasn’t thrilled that I turned a pure HTML document into one with CSS. Oops. I was so confused by the original HTML document, given that it was causing Dreamweaver to have a hernia or something. Half the code turned GREY and I couldn’t edit it. Now, maybe that was a template that I was supposed to work in, but there was still some weird code that was making the layout all wonky. I kept the layout exactly the same, except I revamped it in CSS. Hopefully that’s not too awful. He wasn’t exactly clear on the directions, I was just told to take a pre-existing site and make it look better, and that I did. Oh well.

I’m also writing a bunch of copy for a start-up social networking-esque company. It’s all contract work, but who knows, it could lead to something more. So this week is booked solid with contract work. Next week, my sister comes to visit and I’m “taking the week off” to show her around town. Then I’m going to start focusing on my job applications. Well, I’ve been applying for jobs left and right, but am not sure anyone is going to consider hiring me full time since I was only at my last job for 4 months. That looks really bad in the eyes of a potential employer, and I can’t blame them for doubting me. It’s just frustrating because I know I have so much to give, it’s just my last job wasn’t right for me. I’m not a newshound. I’m somewhat socially anxious, which doesn’t really align with a career in journalism. But how do I explain that to potential employers? “I quit my last job because talking to strangers makes my heart explode.” Yea, that’s going to help me land a great job, for sure. 🙁

In any case, I’m hopeful that something good will come along if i’m patient and bide my time with contract work. If I can manage to turn the contract work into a full-time profession, all the better. But for now, I’m crossing my fingers that I can manage to pay for my rent, basic bills, health insurance cobra, and food until something full-time comes along.

Meanwhile, i’ve decided to focus my free time on getting into shape and figuring out how to be healthy inside and out. I’ve stopped taking the anti-depressents (wow, I took them for a whole 25 days, and now, I’m done) and am looking into herbal stuff instead. (Yup, I bought some St. John’s Wort.) I can’t figure out if all of the nutritional supplements end up costing me more than a psychiatrist and Lexapro, or if they end up costing about the same. In any case, I figured out that my lack of energy and dizziness is probably caused by iron and other nutritional deficiences. This week, I even tried eating red meat (I’ve been a vegetarian for about 10 years, though I started eating fish a year ago) – but after downing a half-pound hamburger yesterday I got sick to my stomach. Let’s just say an hour or so after eating that burger, I only digested about half of it. The rest? Don’t ask. (Yuck.) So I’m done with red meat (again) for now. Instead, I’m looking into other supplements to help the cause of mission get healthy (without – getting broke.) Think I can do it? Well, I certainly hope so.

Uncategorized

Health Insurance Plans & Depression

2 Comments

I called up a psychiatrist for an appointment since I didn’t trust my general doctor to throw random meds my way just because I told her that I was feeling blue and anxious. Whether I’m really depressed or not, I don’t know, but upon my first visit and answering a few questions my psych jotted down a bunch of notes and decided that I’ve got a case of moderate recurrent depression.

After she bitched for about 15 minutes about how most shrinks really hate medical insurance because of “all of the forms” and that it takes so long to get paid, she decided to give me a free trial of an SSRI antidepressent (Lexipro.) I’ve tried a few meds in the past — xanax for my panic attacks and ritalin for my add, but I’ve never consistently taken anything in the past. I’ve just gotten to the point where I can’t take my anxiety anymore, and it’s really getting in the way of functioning. Well, anxiety has gotten in the way of functioning since I was born, it’s just it was easier to hide it when I wasn’t completely responsible for my well being and time management.

Anyway, I figure the medicine will be rather pricey, even with insurance, but at that point I was ready to try anything to get me out of my slump. (That was about a month ago, btw.) Soon found out that a month’s supply of the antidepressant costs $50 (that’s after insurance pays their part.) Ouch. Then my doc also decided to prescribe me sleeping pills — I haven’t picked those up yet so I’m not sure how much they cost.

“Lucky” for me, I’m “severely” depressed, so my insurance only makes me pay $15 a visit (instead of 50 percent of the visits costs, which would be something like $75-$100 a visit, I think.) Also, if I wasn’t “severely” depressed, I’d be limited to 20 visits per year with a shrink. But because I apparently need lots of help, I can go see a therapist as much as I want for just my co-pay.

I barely go to the doctor for anything else, so I figured I might as well make use of my health insurance to help me be, uh, healthy. I’m quickly slipping some place I don’t want to be, and I’m willing to admit I need some outside help.

Well, after the severe depressive disorder went down in my file, I started reading up about future health insurance issues that go along with having pre-existing conditions like depression. My shrink made an aside when she was diagnosing me that she needed to check over time to see if I’m bi-polar, but then she asked for permission to write that down on my charts since apparently that makes it difficult to get insurance later down the road. At the time, I was so out of it and freaked out about the costs of therapy, I figured the worse of a diagnosis I had, the cheaper my costs were going to be.

Now I’m potentially facing a lifetime of overpriced health insurance. My dream is to work as a freelance web designer and marketing copywriter, but being a freelancer I will have to get my own individual health insurance plan. I’ve read many horror stories about people who were depressed and once on meds getting flat out denied when they applied for individual insurance.

Sure it makes sense for the health insurance agencies to protect themselves, but I’m now terrified (and admittedly even more depressed) knowing that one day I might be SOL when it comes to obtaining affordable health insurance. But it just seems so ridiculous that, while health plans cover mental health conditions, it’s all so shady. When I was looking for a psychiatrist in my area, I must have called every single person on my health insurance plan in a 30 mile radius before finding the one psych I’m seeing now. And I’m tired of her bitching about insurance companies and how most psych’s she knows don’t even take insurance anymore. Ok, I’m sorry I’m not rich enough like everyone else who lives in the area to just pay your fees and deal with my depression. I’m like, a normal person with a fairly normal salary and I need help.