Tag Archives: design

Aging, Arts, Career

What I Wish I Knew in 2001

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In 2001 I had secured offers to four out of the five colleges I applied to for costume design. Had I selected any other program my life would be entirely different today. However, the major factor which shifted my life was my sheer naivety regarding how art itself could have become a viable career for a person with a creative soul like myself, vs running from it so haphazardly because I didn’t want to get caught up in a field so superficial untied to a career.

Maybe I made the wrong choice. I don’t know. What I didn’t know then was that 10 years later I’d be working in enterprise software. That instead of leveraging my creativity to launch my own fashion line or show my work in galleries, I’m ghostwriting copy for reports that ultimately matter only so much as they gain the attention of prospective buyers. I could die tomorrow and nothing I’ve created in the past 10 years of my life would matter at all. In fact, most of it already doesn’t. Continue reading What I Wish I Knew in 2001 →

Career

Maybe I am a Bit Too Dramatic

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If you’ve read this blog over the years, you probably roll your eyes every other post. For someone who is doing so “well” in her life I sure am dramatic and whiny. I guess right now I feel as if I’m on a precipice between this life I created for myself and the life that would actually make me happy. The gap is so wide because it was safer to do what was easiest, and to me that was using my creativity to be really good a small aspect of my current role so that enough people were convinced that I was good at the rest of it.

The problem is the majority of my career is about being a machine. Some people thrive on being a machine and being really good at it. That’s not what I do. I’m the anti-machine. I’m not super creative but I look at improving things based on qualitative evidence more than data. That doesn’t fly in Silicon Valley despite the admiration for people like Steve Jobs. It takes a mind that thinks different to revolutionize and drastically improve an industry or product and yet that’s not what people want. If you want to think different you have to not be afraid of doing your own thing. You have to not chase after money or stability but instead, at least at first, just create and if you do it well enough, maybe the rest will come.

Continue reading Maybe I am a Bit Too Dramatic →

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More Thoughts on Job Hunting, The Lay Off, Life

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Here I am, at a major cross roads in my life. One path ahead of me, however difficult to get a solid footing on, is one that leads to a six-figure career, possibly as soon as I sign on the dotted line of my next full-time contract. This road considers my employment history in an area that’s highly desired right now yet not clearly understood, one that important and big companies are seeking to hire expertise in that I now have, if not the knowledge, the employment history to back up. At least more than I did before my last job when my entire employment history was 1.5 years as a journalist, which only got me a foot in the door at some PR firms for a very entry-level position.

The other road, however, is one even more unclear. It’s one filled with $15 per hour jobs sans health insurance, part-time and/or contract work, minimally paid internships, graduate school, going back to the start. And it seems like such a waste of the opportunity I have to make something really “good” come from this layoff (at least in terms of my bank account and professional growth) to jump into an entirely different field that may lead me to a spot with the same “I’m not meant to be here” surroundings on a different path, just two years from now.
There are some opportunities in the first version of this scenerio. Well, to be honest, right now there is one possibility, but others may exist, especially if I’m willing to move. I don’t know if it’s really a six-figure job, but I assume I’ll make at least what I made at my last gig ($60k) and likely more because it’s for a bigger company with a lot more responsibility. There’s a chance they expect to pay $90k or more. I don’t know. I’m in the process of interviewing for the position. It sounds like an amazing opportunity. But I’m terrified of failing. I’m scared of failing when the stakes are higher. I’m scared of not knowing what to do, how to make up the tasks of the job, set measurable goals, and meet or exceed them. Sometimes results related to this role are difficult to quantify, but without the numbers success means nothing in these types of companies. So what do I do?
It is a luxury to get to “choose” but… in reality, I haven’t secured a job offer yet for #1 and I’ve sent out hundreds of resumes in the last three weeks, only to receive a few “you don’t have what we’re looking for” or to just be ignored. I’m onto the second interview stage with the “really good opportunity” job but that means very little other than I have a shot at this gig. I’ll get to interview in person instead of over the phone. They’ll decide if they like me. I’ll decide if I think I can really do this job without falling on my face.
In the meantime, I daydream about things I’d really love to do. Design. User research. Product management. Heck, maybe I’d even enjoy…. teaching? Retail? Being a waitress (I have a friend who loves it.) I don’t know. I’m an INTP. I like solving problems. I like helping people. I do well with the big picture, but not so much the details. I know what type of job I want to have (design research) but I don’t have the experience or skills for that type of job. My resume is schizophrenic. I don’t want to get my hopes up about the opportunity because it may not be right for me. Or I might not get it. And beyond this, I haven’t had any other biters on potential employment. So it’s difficult to compare this opportunity to another, since there currently isn’t another.
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How long would it take to save $150k?

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All of the graduate programs I’m looking at will cost about $150k for 2 or 3 years. Thus, I want to save $150k before applying. Is that possible? How long would it take to, realistically, save $150k?

If I cut out things I don’t really need… voice lessons, dance class, gym membership, etc, I could get my monthly expenditures down significantly. Still, $150k is a lot of money.

I don’t want to take out loans. I don’t want to graduate from grad school in debt. That seems counterproductive to fiscal growth.

I have $30k saved now, though half of that is my retirement savings. Do I want to touch my retirement savings? At least that doesn’t count towards my FAFSA AGI.

Ok, so to save $150k …

$12500 / month for 12 months (1 year)
$6240 / month for 24 months (2 years)
$2500 / month for 60 months (5 years)
$1250 / month for 120 months (10 years)

I bet I could save $1250 a month, but that means I won’t be going to graduate school until 2020. And by then, tuition will cost much more. So this saving up for my tuition seems impossible.

Right now I’m taking in between $3,000-$4,000 / month.

Cutting out all extraneous costs, $1250 / month would be possible to save.

But then… I won’t be saving for retirement in the next 10 years. I won’t be saving for anything else. And I won’t be living life. Oh, and I won’t be able to afford to have children. Which all kind of sucks.

How on earth does anyone justify graduate school (unless it’s all paid for?) How does anyone justify any education (I can’t believe how much my parents paid for my undergraduate degree!) Then again, at the time my dad was making over $200k / year, which, even after taxes, made it possible to cover my $120k undergraduate education. They really should have made me go to the equally–good state school that I got into that would have cost a lot less, but I’m glad they didn’t.

Now, looking at my future, I’m trying to balance how much my career is worth versus being in debt for the rest of my life. I realized that I missed the mark in terms of my undergraduate major, though even with the right major I lacked the maturity at the time to make the most of my education. Not that I partied a lot or anything, I just didn’t want to be there. I didn’t know what I wanted. I felt like I had to be in college because that’s what you do after high school. I didn’t really know WHY I was there. To get a liberal arts education? To get a technical education? Yea, it wasn’t clear. I got a taste of a few different things, but now I really need some sort of focused trade-school-esque education to get where I want in my career.

Speaking of, I’m contemplating seeing a career counselor to help me figure out where that is. I went to my career counselor in college quite a bit, but he wasn’t much help. Maybe the ones that cost $100/hr are better? Apparently it’s normal for an INFP like myself to spend way too much time thinking about all the possibilities without ever acting on them. So I just need some guidance. An adult guidance counselor. I’m starting to think I need that more than therapy. I mean, I know my issues. And yes, I can work on them all my life. The daughter of an upper-middle class everything-is-fine-with-our-family sociopath and a narcissist is bound to turn out a little messed up, right?

I’m just SO TIRED of living my life afraid of failure in the eyes of my parents. I’m looking forward to paying for my own education because then, even if they look down on me for my choice, or roll their eyes at it, I know it’s coming out of my wallet. It’s my education to make the most of, not theirs. Not theirs to waste, either.

I went to a new therapist this morning… a first meeting intended to place me into a group for group therapy. I’m very interested in group therapy because much of my issues, especially those relating to my ability to succeed, are rooted in my complete lack of ability to communicate. It is painful because I know I come off like this conceited bitch because I’m terrified of giving compliments even though in my head 99% of what I’m thinking is a compliment and 1% is “you could just tweak this one thing and everything would be even extra special great.” How on earth do you say that without coming off like a suck up? Agggh.

Well, I know I’ve completely failed on the communication end in my current company. I’ve learned a lot from my mistakes, yet I still make them, and no one really wants to hear my thoughts anyway. Because they are often inspired by a gut feeling more than solid research, so their standpoint is beyond fair.

I just have concluded that ultimately I need to be in a job where I am a problem solver. I am always bursting with solutions and to not be allowed to say them (even though I often do anyway, to the disappointment of my coworkers) is suffocating. I know my ideas are not always right, but I love to collaborate and throw ideas out, bounce off other people, turn an idea into a solution.

I’ve spent my free time this week reading about countless masters programs. MBA programs. HCI programs. ID programs. Design masters programs. With a foundation year for people who didn’t major in design in undergrad. International programs. Online programs. Part-time programs. Dual degree programs. Weekend and evening programs. Programs that can only be completed if you stand on your head and clap five times while hunting wild boars. (Okay, okay, I haven’t found that last one… yet.) I am overwhelmed by all the options and the potential cost of all those options. Any of those options.

All the stress is enough to have me retreat into the status quo forever. And maybe that’s what I’ll do. Or maybe I don’t need grad school to do what I want. Maybe if I can just believe in myself enough I can take a few design classes, get a portfolio together, and shift my career trajectory. I don’t know. I’m obviously more confused than ever. It’s the typical quarter life crisis. Except I kind of know what I want. Or at least I know I want to be solving problems. To be in charge of solving problems. Creatively. I’m most comfortable as a leader, not a follower, but I need a team of equals. I wish I had some realistic support. I won’t get any from my parents and my boyfriend doesn’t understand the financial consequences of grad school… his mother is going to pay for him to get a graduate degree if he doesn’t get a full ride (his undergrad education was much cheaper than mine, so it makes sense that his mom still has money left over for his graduate education.)

I just wish someone sat down with me in senior year of high school and forced me to take a year off and work before going to college. I wish someone explained why despite “liberal arts” magical allure, ultimately you should be using college to get the skills you need for a job. A job that you’ll actually like. Not just one you’re qualified for because you have a BA.

Anyway, that’s enough rant for tonight. I hate that I always sound so spoiled. I just want to pay my way through graduate school, work hard, and feel like I own my successes and my failures. I want to own… me.

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Professional Roadblock

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For the first time in my life, I like my job a lot. It pays well, I work with really smart people who I admire, and I’ve managed to secure a full time gig… which means they like me, or at least the work I do, at least in the sense that I’m not that easily replaceable. All that is good, great, even, yet I’m still not doing exactly what I want to do.

I really want to do a good job for a long enough amount of time to prove I can stick it out. It’s just hard because I get a bit frustrated when I have no right to be frustrated. Basically, what I want to do isn’t in my job description. It is apparently in everyone else’s. I’m also a tad bit annoying in that I haven’t mastered the art of speaking yet… I talk too much, I think everyone dislikes me for it, and sometimes I don’t talk enough, and then I feel like I just disappear. Why can’t I fit on some middle ground so I can be respected AND taken seriously?

All I want to do is design. Do user interaction design, specifically. But I’m completely confused over how I can make the career switch, or if I even should. Grad school seems to be the only possibility, but even that is a far off dream. First of all, I’d have to GET IN to grad school… there are only a few top programs for this new field and each of them are hard to get into. Looking at the people they seem to accept, they want people with experience in the field. While my experience is related, it’s definitely not in the field. It’s gazing on the field with envy, if anything. Does that count?

My passion is great user experience. I tried to be a writer but I’m not really that great of a writer. I tried marketing but I’m not the best at marketing a product that has all these details that I’d like to tweak. I can fake it. I can fake it all. But in the long run, I don’t want to fake it. I want to cease this frustration and have a job where I can actually make a difference in the development of a product as far as the ultimate user experience goes. I’m still thinking an MBA might be a better route to go – get more involved in product strategy, stay out of the details, but then I end up futzing around with wireframes all night dreaming of a day when I could design interfaces for a living. Will that day ever come? And how much debt will I have to take on to see it?

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OMFGrad School

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Graduate school is a huge sacrifice. Am I ready to take it?

At 25, my career is going well, but in order to really get where I want to be I need something big. Either that’s a lot of luck or a lot of education. I’m stuck. At least I think I am. My experience is rousing no ones interests and the economic situation in the country isn’t helping.

I have a job at a company where I’m making 57k a year w/ no benefits, and I could get let go every third month because that’s how long my contracts usually last. My skills don’t merit a full time position. I work 40 hours a week. I’ve been with this company for over a year now.

One route I could go down in the management route. But as much as an MBA makes $ sense, it doesn’t really work out in my head. My passion is and will always be design, and since I have a psychology-business bent I’ve found myself addicted to Interaction Design.

There are a lot of successful interaction designers without graduate degrees, but they often have technical experience that gets them jobs where they can also do ID. Not so when it comes to people like me… who just feel stabbing pains whenever I view poor UI.

So… grad school is an option. I’m completely at a loss over whether it is the right option or not. When I went home to visit the fam for Thanksgiving I visited two graduate programs in NYC. They were very, very different. One was the Technology & Design program at NYU. I visited this second. The program was housed in the school’s art building, and that place was a fluttering with artists. The tech floor felt like I walked into some experimental art exhibit. Cool, but probably not for me. The program seems a little too techy. The good thing about that program is it’s flexible in that there are few required courses and you basically design your own program. But that’s what got me into trouble in undergrad. If anything, I need a grad program that will force me to focus. Few or no electives, just a structured curriculum with the flexibility existing only in my thesis / final project.

Plus, I just didn’t get a good vibe from the NYU program. Sure, the students seemed happy, but I just didn’t feel like I’d click there. Compared to SVA, which I visited earlier in the day, it was black and white to me. Of course, when I visited SVA there wasn’t much of a “program” to visit. They’re launching an MFA in Interaction Design in the fall. So right now there’s an office, a head of the program, and an assistant. And floor plans. Which can be a good or bad thing. For a lot of reasons.

I’m attracted to the MFA at SVA for a lot of reasons. #1 is the professors they have lined up. The roster is rather impressive. Various interaction designers that are at the top of the field. Connections aplenty. That doesn’t speak for whether they are good teachers, but ultimately graduate school is about meeting the right people, spending time to teach yourself about the field, and, oh yea, did I mention meeting the right people?

The awesome thing about my visit to SVA was how the head of the program took the time to have coffee with me and chat. I asked a zillion questions. I definitely felt like I was being courted to apply, whereas at NYU they didn’t care if I applied or not. Granted, with a brand new program it makes sense that the chair is trying to court the right students. The success of this program seems to depend greatly on the students she choses. With only 15 students in the program, each one of those heads will make all the difference. Not only does she have to select people with potential, she also has to figure out if there is a good blend of people in such a small, collaborative program. It’s a tough job, I don’t envy her.

It’s really hard to judge the program at this point. I’d be trading $65k for two years of education, plus losing about $110k in salary, minus room & board, etc, etc. Ouch. Just thinking about the numbers makes me wonder how anyone decides to go to grad school (unless they somehow get a free ride or major scholarship money.)

The good news is that the SVA program is mostly at night, so it leaves time to work during the days. By “work,” I mean intern, since I’d probably want to build up my work experience in the field and not just continue working as a writer (though some writing might work well for me, at least to cover rent and things).

I’m also concerned that I just have this romanticized idea of graduate study. I know it’s work, and a lot of work at that, but I also am upset at myself for not figuring out what I want to study sooner and missing out on a really great HCI (human computer interaction) program at my undergrad institution. Since I can’t rewind time, I need to look ahead and think… grad school, or, at the least, taking classes in the field.

There are so many options outside of grad school that could possibly land me in the same spot. Self education. Courses at community college. A local State University that has an MA in multimedia studies that would cost me $20k for two years, and is a night program so day-time work is do-able. Trying my darndest to get an internship with an Interaction Design firm. Weeding my way in via a paid copywriter position and learning more on the job. Meeting the right people outside of school.

When all of those options exist, how can I take the plunge? Or, when all of those options exist in theory but don’t quite pan out in reality, how can I not?

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The Unfortunate Quest to be Anything Other than Average

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Blaming Attention Deficit Disorder is easy, but the fact of the matter is that I have a serious problem with my inability to complete projects. Of course, I’m working hard to combat this problem and I’ve been doing a good job of it at my current contract gig.

But, even though I think I’m working hard, I still feel like my employer views me negatively. Maybe that’s my problem — as I always convince myself that people dislike me until proven otherwise. There are a few other projects on my plate that I’m behind on, or that are basically gone for good because, well, I took on more than I can chew. I don’t really know enough about interactive design yet to build multimedia sites, yet I tried once and it didn’t work. I’d like to take some classes in these things so it won’t take me hours browsing through tutorials to make a relatively simple site that has more than just graphics and text, but unfortunately, I don’t have time or the money to do that right now.

With my writing work… I feel like such a fake. I don’t think I’m a good writer. I think I’m a much better designer, without the technical skills to profit from my somewhat decent talent in that area. Meanwhile, writing is easy… to fake. Anyone can pretend to be a writer. But what matters is the content.

Maybe I just lost my love for writing. Once I wanted to be a journalist. But now all I do is dream about a day when I can design for a living. I feel like I get color and line and composition. What I don’t get is the composition of paragraphs or sentences.

I’m just tired of being a F&#& up. How did I get so far this fast and yet at every turn I run straight into a wall of my own creation? I’m over and done with it. I want to be successful, but my motivation levels… my non-temporary motivation levels… dwindle faster than George Bush’s ratings since going to war with Iraq.

Am I the only person who practices somewhat subconscious self sabotage? I’m so afraid of proving to myself that I’m actually a failure that all I can do is fail before I have the chance to do it unintentionally.

I need to stop feeling like I need to do something GREAT in order to succeed. I know it’s the little things that are meaningful, yet I don’t believe it. I want to be famous, or brilliant, or… anything other than average.

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The Bartering Trend

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Up until earlier this year, when I thought of the term “bartering” pictures of Pilgrims, the Amish, and even some current third-world countries came to mind. Why “barter” for goods when we have this wonderful thing called paper (and metal) money?

Then I found out that bartering is a great way to exchange services or goods without having to deal with the hassle of money. Unfortunately, the IRS still requires that you report your bartering “income” come tax time. My philosophy? Don’t ask, don’t tell. Like it? I got the idea from the government. Brilliant, isn’t it? If you want to find out more about taxes and bartering, the IRS has lovingly put together a detailed informational page for anyone who wants to report their bartered “earnings”.

Right now, my bartering income is quite limited. My freelance business model isn’t designed to support itself through bartering, but I decided to try it out. My personal opinion on bartering is that, since it does not involve money, should also not involve the government.

Bartering feels like a ‘clean’ way to deal with commerce. At the moment I’m doing a barter deal with a personal trainer. She’s offering me training sessions in exchange for web design. I’m still sans quality health insurance right now (I’m signing up for a catastrophic plan next week) so I feel like preventative care via working out is probably a good idea. Besides, I like that I can use my skill as a web designer and make this personal trainer a fabulous homepage, which she needs, and in exchange, I work out at least two times a week, which I need.

If you don’t have a “skill” that you think would be valuable for trade, think again. Some people just like the idea of bartering, and they’ll trade for just about anything, as seen on this Craigslist Barter page for the SF Bay Area.

Just be careful about trading services, because you might get screwed over in the end. The woman who is giving me personal training sessions lives close by, and we trust each other enough to exchange services. It would get messy if I decided to just up and walk away from designing the site after she has given me a few training sessions. I imagine that at some point, such a situation could conclude with an icky court situation. Lucky for us, we’re both game on this deal, and I’m making a great website for her, and she’s kicking my ass into shape.

Here are some other barter sites that I’ve found on the interest that may be of interest to you:
(disclaimer: I haven’t used any of these sites)

SERVICES AND GOODS BARTERING
BarterYourServices
u-Exchange.com
BarterPlanet.com
TrashBank.com
TheInternetBarterExchange

BARTERING AUCTIONS
BarterBart

CORPORATE BARTERING
Premier Barter
BizXchange
National Trade Association

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New Design!!!

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After over a year of procrastinating, I’ve finally gotten around to revamping this blog. It’s not perfect, but as it looked like it belonged in the gallery of blogger-crap-of-fame before, I’m proud of the updates. What do you think? Any suggestions?

Mental Illness

the nightmare that is figuring out taxes and health insurance as a freelancer

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the absolutely marvelous news is that i just landed a steady, well-paid, 30 hrs/week contract gig for the next three months.

the bad news it that now i have to figure out how on earth to get myself decent health insurance… and how to sort out my income and expenses for tax season.

contract work is great because of the flexibility, but all the additional “work” I have to do to be self-employed is rather terrifying.

first off — health insurance: i already know i will be denied if i tell the truth on my health insurance applications, because i took lexapro ONE MONTH for “major depression.” On the Tonik health insurance application, you get to click off your pre-existing medical conditions. Guess what category major depression falls into? “Bipolar disorder/Major Depression/Schizophrenia”

Um. I went to a psychiatrist for about two months, took meds for one month, and i kind of feel better now.

My psychiatrist kind of warned me about the potential health insurance issues, but she wasn’t very clear about it. She just said that she doesn’t like working with health insurance — because it takes her forever to get paid. And then when she was considering diagnosing me with bipolar, she asked me if it would be ok to note that on my diagnosis form, since most clients don’t want that on there, as it could hurt their chances of getting health insurance later on.

First off, I was rather ignorant at the time, thinking that health insurance existed to help you get better (wrong) and that it would be cheaper for me to use my $15 co-pay visits with a ‘major depression’ diagnosis as opposed to 50% pay for ADD or anxiety or anything else that I probably actually have (I doubt I have major depression. It’s probably recurring, but I go through phases in my life. Life is hard and sometimes i’m sad and sometimes I need someone to talk to, but I don’t think this is a life-long condition). Anyway…

So I got my $15 visits, which was nice for the two months I say my psychiatrist and my therapist. And now? Well, chances are I won’t be able to get health insurance. Because apparently whatever it is I have is just as bad as SCHIZOPHRENIA in the eyes of my potential insurers.

I spoke with a health insurance agent who, off the record, basically suggested that i take the risk and lie on my application, because that would be the only way i could get decent insurance. but, of course, then i could basically screw myself over by doing that, since health insurance companies could find out that i lied and make me pay for EVERYTHING since when i signed up for their insurance. that’s a scary thought.

Or – do I just be honest and watch as my applications get denied? I haven’t got my forms for Cobra yet, but I’m sure that will be ridiculously expensive. I had really good health insurance (Blue Shield PPO) through my employer with a $250 deductible, and now I’m looking at whatever I can get with a $1500-$5000 deductible and poor benefits. And to get that I might still have to lie.

But I should have health insurance. I realize it’s stupid to be living without health insurance. I just am not sure what kind to get. Basically I need the doctor to prescribe me Yasmin birth control pills each month (and hopefully for them not to cost me a fortune) — I need “Yasmin” specifically for hormonal imbalances and such, but unfortunately getting cheaper pills through something like planned parenthood will not let me get that brand.

Besides health insurance, there’s the issue of taxes. Gosh, I’m so behind of keeping tabs on what I’ve made in contract work this year. I know, bad me. I just set up a google docs spreadsheet to start taking detailed notes from hereonout, but I’m not 100% sure what I’ve made thus far this year. In any case, I know that taxes are going to take a HUGE CHUNK out of my income, which is fine, they did that before, but it’s just really hard to determine how much taxes will be when I don’t even know how much work I will have each month.

At least now I have a stable three month gig where I will be making $3300 a month, assuming they like me and want to keep me for the entirety of the contracted position. After that, either I get to stay on board, or it’s back to the drawing board. We’ll see. Meanwhile, my goal is to pick up one or two freelance web design projects per month, where I’d make anywhere from $500-$1000 per project (although I’m starting out with really cheap rates of like $200 per project.)

Anyway… for the next three months, my ‘income’ before taxes, minus any additional web design projects, should be $3700, which includes the contract gig and another ongoing contract project where I make $400 a month writing a few articles for my uncle’s marketing firm. $3700 a month is definitely not a bad wage, but after taxes, and health insurance, I’m not sure how much that actually is. It’d be something like $2700 a month or something? So after rent, that’s $1650 a month. Phone bill, gym membership and cable tv/internet are like, $200, so then I have $1450 left. Ok, not bad. Health insurance, assuming I go for a decent kind, will be like $300 a month. So that’s maybe $1150 left for food, entertainment and such.

Ok, I guess that’s not awful. But I just am scared about not understanding taxes and all the complicated stuff that goes into expensing things and such. Meanwhile, I just read that self-employed individuals pay a lot more in taxes because usually the company pays for like half of the taxes, but when you work for yourself you are your own company.

So. I guess I have a lot of figuring out to do. In the meantime, I have to wrap up three projects I’m working on. I’m writing some company for a startup (basically, I’m writing all the copy that will go on their site), then I have to finish this one website for a client, and then I’ve got to wrap up the basic design for a project I’m doing in a ‘trade’ deal with a personal trainer. 5 hours of web design for 4 hours of personal training. It’s not a bad deal, considering she charges $78 an hour and I charge $50. Anyway, I can tell she’s getting antsy to see the page (I already had three training sessions this week, but I told her I’d show her something this weekend.) Well, I’ve got to finish that. I’m trying my darndest to figure out Flash because A) she seems to really like pages with Flash in them and B) I need at least one site for my portfolio that incorporates Flash, so I can show clients that I can atleast put some basic animation on their pages.

Anyway.

Life is going pretty good, minus all of this confusion. My birthday is coming up next week. I’m turning 24. Happy, uh, confused birthday to me.