Somehow it’s almost July 1 and half way through the year. That’s good and bad, I guess. Good, in that my mission to survive the year at my current employer is looking more and more likely. Bad, in that time goes by too fast, and my kids are growing up before my eyes and due to some of my own health issues and exhaustion I haven’t had the energy to engage with them as much as I’d like.
I know those who have been reading my blog for a long time think I’m crazy in that once upon a time $1M was my “impossible goal” and then I passed that and now I’m on to another “impossible goal” — it’s seems I’ll never be satisfied. But I promise, it’s not that. I know that once my family gets to $5M, we can FIRE and have $200k a year to live on, even if we’re unable to work. Given both my husband and I have some health concerns at the moment, who knows how long we will be able to remain employed. The more we can make and save now the better.
My hope is (was) to achieve $2.5M this year (including home equity after sale value.) Checking in on how I’m doing…
Clearly not making much progress towards my goal, but will see how the year shakes out. I’m probably paying too much in taxes so it’s possible I’ll have a refund (or not need to pay much for the last estimate this year) and things will look a little different then.
At the moment I’m heads down on keeping the job. My bosses have made it clear to me there is no place for me to grow at the company (in fact there was serious consideration about demoting me but they kindly decided not to — though I’m pretty sure that’s because it wouldn’t look great to demote a woman who just came back from maternity leave and what’s really happening is that they want me out and are waiting until it’s safe to pull the trigger.) I’m doing some good work (which they’ve also recognized) but I’m not a fit for the company. I had a heart-to-heart with my old boss (who my new boss reports into) and she basically told me to figure out what I want, what kind of company I want to be in, etc. But she also said to do this over the next year, which was great to hear since that means she’s not planning on getting rid of me tomorrow. I can now just focus on improving in the areas where I’m weak and see if I can walk away with a decent reference.
I need to celebrate somehow when I finish vesting my first grant. I wish my husband was on the same wavelength when it comes to finances and the significance of this. How hard it is for me to hold a job and how much our net worth increased in the past four years. While I’m disappointed I won’t be able to continue getting stock and promotions (I mean, get any promotion in the first place), my whole career has led to this. Did I deserve any of it? Probably not. But I’ve added value to the company and I’m still employed.
When I started this job in 2017 my net worth (personal) was $515k. It’s now $1.8M. It’s surprisingly easy to forget this, or take it for granted, or feel like $1.8M is not enough money. It wasn’t all income and company stock… my investments also went up during this time period. But… I mean, this is significant growth. It’s probably not comprehendible to many of you who are still aiming for that first $100k (and I’ve been there too.)
So, this December I should celebrate. And I wish my husband would care a little bit about it. I know he likes the house we live in. I know he’s pretty baffled by my ability to get jobs and earn more money when I seem to crumble at every single one of them. But I want to feel jointly excited about it. I want to have him recognize this accomplishment and take me out to dinner or something and — not say thank you but, I don’t know, have some appreciation for how hard it is for me and how I’m holding on for dear life and refusing to let go.
We’ll probably buy a minivan. A brand new mini van. That will be the celebration. Maybe a new garage door and kitchen table.
Or maybe I’ll spend all my money on doctors since I can’t figure out why I’m so fatigued all the time. Maybe I’ll look back on this time and see it as the pinnacle of everything.
Or maybe I’ll keep managing to earn more and grow my net worth. The $2.5M this year still seems unlikely, but if I can get there than $3M feels all the more closer. And while $3M isn’t the goal, it’s definitely a serious step to my FIRE goals.